Growing up in South Africa, my folks tried to keep things as American in culture as possible. The culture there was so vastly different from our own, not bad, but different, that they wanted to preserve our heritage as much as they could. Not only was the culture different, but there were also many cultures within the country. The Asiatic Indians, the tribal Black people, those who were a mixture of black and white, referred to as people of color at the time, and the Whites, who were originally from Europe. Each of these groups in the sixties had already grown to the millions and had made their mark; therefore, while enjoying what they had to offer, my parents tried to infuse into us their down home, Louisianian culture, because we were so young.
They introduced us to things like baseball, board games, and games played with the youth group that we would have seen in America. We played with Barbie dolls for hours, made mud pies in the back yard, chased fireflies in the front yard, climbed trees, roller skated and rode bicycles. As we grew older, we learned to sew, cross stitch, embroider, knit, and crochet. Though I was able to do most of those to a degree, my mother’s favorites were crocheting and sewing. Though in her later years, she did a lot of cross stitching, quilting, and painting, and has left us quite a few mementos. All these skills involve the intertwining of threads, in various weights, colors and methods. The threads or yarn must be closely knit to create a final product. Two balls of yarn on opposite sides of the room could be considered pretty, or complimentary to one another; however, they are not yet a product that has a purpose. Material may be beautiful and be able to cover you, but without thread, a garment cannot be created. The ornateness or usefulness comes from the finished product.
Upon the completion of a cross-stitch, you will end up with a beautiful picture; the sewing process will yield a dress, shirt, pants, pillowcases, tablecloths, or curtains, the choices are endless. Embroidering can produce a beautiful doily, pillowcase design, or can even be used to cover flaws in an old garment. With the magic and knowledge of how to use the needles along with the yarn, knitting and crocheting can go from simple to elaborate, from traditional sweaters and Afghans to baby booties, doilies, dresses, toilet paper and toaster covers, to tea cozies, hats, purses, mittens, scarves, vests, toys and much more. The choices only stop when your creative juices run out. With any of these items, you will look at them and appreciate the work that went into them, and the usefulness of them, because they are a finished product. You have taken raw materials, distinct items and put them together to produce something beautiful. This brings a sense of accomplishment.
These talents would have been considered essential years ago, before industrial machinery came along. However, it has been five decades since I learned these skills that have gone by the wayside, but recently I have been seeing a revival of knitting and crocheting on social media as a hobby and serious pastime. Though buying the readymade product might be cheaper at this point, it would not include the sense of accomplishment that goes with doing it yourself. It seems that all trends come and go, but will eventually return, though maybe reimagined, as in the new fad of Diamond Embroidery painting for instance. Solomon said it this way, in Ecclesiastes 1:9, “The thing that hath been, it is that which shall be and that which is done is that which shall be done: and there is no new thing under the sun.”
There is an innate need for mankind to create and be productive. We want to be surrounded by beauty, but we get bored with the same status quo. Everything that we do and have now, is the brainchild of those who have gone before us, and we must therefore make something with our own hands for it to be unique and bring us the sense of fulfillment we crave. People often will sink into a state of depression when they do not have personal hobbies or things that interest them. This is known especially regarding the elderly. To keep them engaged, they need to have a purpose, and a task that they can be responsible for.
Another basic need that we all share from birth to death, is the sense of belonging. It is said of premature babies that they need skin to skin touch on a regular basis by parents while in the hospital to survive and thrive, because they have lost that development time in the womb. Building a bond with them in the early days will assist in their transition when they are big and strong enough to go home. Children most often run to their mothers when they are sick; however, not always, because there is a nurturing connection that has been built between them. Any other time, the mom may be of no significance, except maybe at mealtime. Have you ever had such a good friend that even when you do not see them for years, you connect right away and pick up right where you left off. These are two distinct individuals brought together by an emotional connection that cannot always be explained, but they are knitted together and form a finished product called friendship. This is a priceless commodity.
This type of friendship bond is seen in an ongoing story in scripture. The first character is introduced in 1 Samuel 17:54-58,“And David took the head of the Philistine, and brought it to Jerusalem; but he put his armor in his tent. And when Saul saw David go forth against the Philistine, he said unto Abner, the captain of the host, Abner, whose son is this youth? And Abner said, as thy soul liveth, O king, I cannot tell. And the king said, enquire thou whose son the stripling is. And as David returned from the slaughter of the Philistine, Abner took him, and brought him before Saul with the head of the Philistine in his hand. And Saul said to him, Whose son art thou, thou young man? And David answered, I am the son of thy servant Jesse the Bethlehemite.”
The second actor shows up in 1 Samuel 18:1-5, “And it came to pass, when he had made an end of speaking unto Saul, that the soul of Jonathan was knit with the soul of David, and Jonathan loved him as his own soul. And Saul took him that day and would let him go no more home to his father’s house. Then Jonathan and David made a covenant because he loved him as his own soul. And Jonathan stripped himself of the robe that was upon him, and gave it to David, and his garments, even to his sword, and to his bow, and to his girdle. And David went out whithersoever Saul sent him and behaved himself wisely: and Saul set him over the men of war, and he was accepted in the sight of all the people, and also in the sight of Saul’s servants.”
Before anyone knew who David was, he had already been anointed king secretly by Samuel, but many things transpired in the fifteen years between his first anointing as seen in 1 Samuel 16:1-13 and his actual anointing and appointing as king of Judah as seen in 2 Samuel 2:4. Johnathan was King Saul’s eldest son. He was a warrior in his own right, and had fought many battles and won, and he feared the Lord and was very loyal to his father. He was around 27 years older than David and though he did not know that David had already been anointed, he knew that the kingdom had been taken from his family lineage, because of his father’s disobedience to God. This is how they had become acquainted. We see in I Samuel 16:14-23, note, this is also without Saul’s knowledge of David’s anointing and before the slaying of Goliath, but with the hand of God orchestrating David’s life. “But the Spirit of the Lord departed from Saul, and an evil spirit from the Lord troubled him. And Saul’s servants said unto him, behold now, an evil spirit from God troubles thee. Let our lord now command thy servants, which are before thee, to seek out a man, who is a cunning player on an harp: and it shall come to pass, when the evil spirit from God is upon thee, that he shall play with his hand, and thou shalt be well. And Saul said unto his servants, provide me now a man that can play well, and bring him to me. Then answered one of the servants, and said, Behold, I have seen a son of Jesse the Bethlehemite, that is cunning in playing, and a mighty valiant man, and a man of war, and prudent in matters, and a comely person, and the Lord is with him. Wherefore Saul sent messengers unto Jesse, and said, Send me David thy son, which is with the sheep. And Jesse took an ass laden with bread, and a bottle of wine, and a kid, and sent them by David his son unto Saul. And David came to Saul and stood before him: and he loved him greatly; and he became his armourbearer. And Saul sent to Jesse, saying, Let David, I pray thee, stand before me; for he hath found favor in my sight. And it came to pass, when the evil spirit from God was upon Saul, that David took a harp, and played with his hand: so, Saul was refreshed, and was well, and the evil spirit departed from him.”
David was just a young teenager, and nothing was even known about him or his family, though he had been coming to the palace regularly to play for Saul when he became vexed with evil. David’s talents with the harp were not prerequisites for becoming king, however, his talents did make room for him. This portion of his story is possibly why Solomon his son later wrote in Proverbs 18:16, “A man’s gift maketh room for him, and bringeth him before great men.” Everything changed at that moment in chapter 18, when they brought David into Saul, carrying the head of Goliath! That was the turning point. Everyone began inquiring about him, wondering “what manner of man is this.” Remember this was said of Jesus after He did something great as well, in Matthew 8:27, “But the men marveled, saying, what manner of man is this, that even the winds and the sea obey him!”
Jonathan was a man of integrity and honor, and his admiration for David went beyond just wanting to know the ins and outs of his family tree. He felt a deeper, inward connection between them, no matter who he was or where he had come from. He loved him and possibly even saw a younger version of himself in David. They had a kindred spirit, and their souls became ‘knitted’ together. Two people could not have been from more different circumstances in life, yet they became friends for the rest of their lives! That day they made a covenant which Jonathan sealed by giving David his own robe, garments, sword, bow, and his girdle. What a beautiful story of the finished product called friendship. They were like ‘peas and carrots’ as Forrest Gump said in the movie of the same name, from thirty years ago now, describing his connection with Jenny. Life happened to them both which took them down different paths, and they both overcame the obstacles that were thrown at them, but in the end, they were reunited as if they had never been apart. It shows the connection two people can have, and tugs on the heartstrings. Jonathan and Davids’ lives evolved for the fifteen years that followed, with David having to flee from Saul for his very life, and even being saved by Jonathan on occasion.
David mourned when he heard of the death of Jonathan and Saul on the battle field. He was connected to them as family as well by this time, seeing that he was married to Saul’s daughter Michal. His dearest friend had become a mentor and a brother-in-law. He honored Saul as Gods anointed and had the man killed who not only brought him the sad message of their death but had also openly confessed to killing Saul. In 2 Samuel 1:17-27 David’s talents as an orator and songwriter are seen once again, as he gives a personal eulogy for his friend.
And David lamented with this lamentation over Saul and over Jonathan his son: The beauty of Israel is slain upon thy high places: how are the mighty fallen! Tell it not in Gath, publish it not in the streets of Askelon; lest the daughters of the Philistines rejoice, lest the daughters of the uncircumcised triumph. Ye mountains of Gilboa, let there be no dew, neither let there be rain, upon you, nor fields of offerings: for there, the shield of the mighty is vilely cast away, the shield of Saul, as though he had not been anointed with oil. From the blood of the slain, from the fat of the mighty, the bow of Jonathan turned not back, and the sword of Saul returned not empty. Saul and Jonathan were lovely and pleasant in their lives, and in their death, they were not divided: they were swifter than eagles, they were stronger than lions. Ye daughters of Israel, weep over Saul, who clothed you in scarlet, with other delights, who put on ornaments of gold upon your apparel. How are the mighty fallen in the midst of the battle! O Jonathan, thou wast slain in thine high places. I am distressed for thee, my brother Jonathan: very pleasant hast thou been unto me: thy love to me was wonderful, passing the love of women. How are the mighty fallen, and the weapons of war perished!
David was anointed King a few days later, and his reign began, battles were won and lost, and life went on. It is not known how many years later exactly, but it was possibly 15 to 20 years, David became nostalgic and remembered his friend, Jonathan, that his soul was ‘knit’ to. Anyone who has lost a loved one can relate to this. He began enquiring if there was anyone left of Saul’s family, so that he could show them kindness. He found Mephibosheth, Jonathan’s son, who had been lame since he was five years old, when his nurse dropped him, when at the news of his father and grandfathers’ death, they were running to hide from the Philistine army that was approaching to kill everyone and conquer the land. They escaped and she then hid him because of the shame and disgrace he would endure. David brought him to Jerusalem, restored to him Saul’s land, and gave him all of Saul’s remaining servants to care for him and the land. He then commanded that he would be fed from the king’s table for the rest of his life. Mephibosheth had a young son named Micah who continued the family name. There was opposition and things were not always easy between them, yet on one occasion we see where the people called for the rightful death of seven of Saul’s descendants, because of their acts against the King. 2 Samuel 21:7 tells us, “But the king spared Mephibosheth, the son of Jonathan the son of Saul, because of the Lord’s oath that was between them, between David and Jonathan the son of Saul.” David carried Jonathan’s promise of friendship with him until he died.
The late Rev. Thomas L. Craft who was the president of the bible college my husband and I attended, used to tell us, the students, that if we had one to five devoted friends when we died, we could indeed consider ourselves rich. The bonds we form of friendship should not be taken lightly or for granted. They are priceless. It is often said in gest, “You can’t pick your family, but you can pick your friends.” If this is indeed true, we should pick wisely. Find those who share the same passions as we do, and that we have a deeper connection to, than can just be seen outwardly. In this social media driven world of texting and keeping to ourselves, we should step out of our shells and be the one to initiate the conversation. Do not always wait to be befriended but take the first step from time to time. Good friends are out there to be had, and as we learn from David and Jonathan, it is a two way street, a covenant that we make. Age, gender, race, culture, or religion are not the defining factors of who will make a great friend. On the other hand, it is said that “Blood is thicker than water.” Never negate the friendship and bond you can have with your spouse, siblings, parents, or other family members, because these will be some of the closest you may have in your life. Yet there is one friendship that should surpass them all.
The scriptures are filled with directives on how to make friends, who to be friends with and who to avoid, but we see this truth in Proverbs 18:24, “A man that hath friends must shew himself friendly: and there is a friend that sticketh closer than a brother.” Jesus wants to be that friend to us, yet we must always keep in mind that he is the King of Kings and the Lord of Lords. He tells us in John 15:12-15, “This is my commandment, that ye love one another, as I have loved you. Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends. Ye are my friends, if ye do whatsoever I command you. Henceforth I call you not servants; for the servant knoweth not what his lord doeth: but I have called you friends; for all things that I have heard of my Father I have made known unto you.” Even if you do not have an earthly friend, Jesus wants us to cast our cares upon Him. He is a great listener and the best one we could ever confide in. He understands our griefs and sorrows and bore all our iniquity upon himself on the cross, so he will never be shocked by anything you share with him. Our souls become knitted with his when we receive the New Covenant promise, His Spirit. He is storing up our every prayer in vials in heaven. Jesus is like that friend who hears us mention what our favorite color or flower is, or something we might like for our birthday or Christmas, or a place we might like to see. He remembers it and makes us feel special. He is waiting to hear from us daily.
The story of the church shows us a beautiful, finished tapestry. We are all raw materials all taken from diverse cultures, races, ages, environments, and threaded together into the body of Christ as one body and He is the head. We are all ‘knitted’ together. 1 Corinthians 12:20 says, “But now are they many members, yet but one body.” And Philippians 1:27 says, “…stand fast in one spirit, with one mind striving together for the faith of the gospel.” It only takes one thing in common to draw us to someone, so let us capitalize on the bond we have as Christians and lay aside our differences. You will be surprised by the friends and mentors that the Lord will bring into your life. Pick up the art of knitting, crocheting, and needlepointing once again, literally, and metaphorically, and become a friend to someone today. You will find the benefits you reap will be a beautiful, finished product called friendship.